Kennzeichen des internationalen Kapitalismus - 500 Beiträge pro Seite
eröffnet am 26.05.03 22:37:07 von
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Meistdiskutierte Wertpapiere
Platz | vorher | Wertpapier | Kurs | Perf. % | Anzahl | ||
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1. | 1. | 18.494,00 | -0,15 | 154 | |||
2. | 4. | 3,1800 | -1,40 | 53 | |||
3. | 6. | 8,0000 | +1,91 | 49 | |||
4. | 13. | 4,9040 | -0,81 | 48 | |||
5. | 8. | 1,2702 | +1,21 | 44 | |||
6. | 9. | 166,42 | +0,36 | 43 | |||
7. | 2. | 1,9985 | +0,43 | 40 | |||
8. | 5. | 4,9800 | +4,18 | 38 |
>TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one
>and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
>
>
>ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell
>three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit
>opened by your brother-in-law the banker, then execute a debt/equity
>swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows
>back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six
>cows are transferred via an intermediary to the Cayman Island company
>secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all
>seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the
>company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Sell one cow to
>buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows.
>No balance sheet provided with the release. The public buys your bull.
>
>
>AN AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You sell
>one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are
>surprised when the cow drops dead.
>
>
>A FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You go on strike
>because you want three cows.
>
>
>A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign
>them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty
>times the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images called
>Cowkimon and market them worldwide.
>
>
>A GERMAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You reengineer
>them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
>
>
>A BRITISH CORPORATION: You have two cows. Both are mad.
>
>
>AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You don`t know
>where they are. You break for lunch.
>
>
>A RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them
>and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have
>42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop
>counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
>
>
>A SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5000 cows, none of which belong
>to you. You charge others for storing them.
>
>
>A HINDU CORPORATION: You have two cows. You worship them.
>
>
>A CHINESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You have 300 people
>milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and
arrest
>the newsman who reported the numbers.
>
>
>AN ARKANSAS CORPORATION: You have two cows...Hey, that one
>on the left is kinda cute...
>and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
>
>
>ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell
>three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit
>opened by your brother-in-law the banker, then execute a debt/equity
>swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows
>back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six
>cows are transferred via an intermediary to the Cayman Island company
>secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all
>seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the
>company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Sell one cow to
>buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows.
>No balance sheet provided with the release. The public buys your bull.
>
>
>AN AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You sell
>one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are
>surprised when the cow drops dead.
>
>
>A FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You go on strike
>because you want three cows.
>
>
>A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign
>them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty
>times the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images called
>Cowkimon and market them worldwide.
>
>
>A GERMAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You reengineer
>them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
>
>
>A BRITISH CORPORATION: You have two cows. Both are mad.
>
>
>AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You don`t know
>where they are. You break for lunch.
>
>
>A RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them
>and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have
>42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop
>counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
>
>
>A SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5000 cows, none of which belong
>to you. You charge others for storing them.
>
>
>A HINDU CORPORATION: You have two cows. You worship them.
>
>
>A CHINESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You have 300 people
>milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and
arrest
>the newsman who reported the numbers.
>
>
>AN ARKANSAS CORPORATION: You have two cows...Hey, that one
>on the left is kinda cute...
und auf deutsch
Super Thread, abschreckender Titel (klingt so kommunistisch).
Gruß, Mucker
Gruß, Mucker
eben hab ichs war gar nicht schwer nur enron war müssig
Die kleinen Variationen sind es, die alte Kettenwitze immer wieder aufpeppen.
AN ARKANSAS CORPORATION: You have two cows...Hey, that one
>on the left is kinda cute...
ich schmeiss mich ja immer noch wech
>on the left is kinda cute...
ich schmeiss mich ja immer noch wech
einfach zum
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