dear penis - 500 Beiträge pro Seite

[amada]

http://tlf.cx/dearpenis.swf



Gruß Amada

[Aufschlag]

Ich lach mich schlapp

[detektivrockford]

[invest2002]

wirklich herrlich

invest2002

[amada]

[StellaLuna]

[Mirabellchen]

In der Tat nicht sehr bekömmlich.

[Mirabellchen]

Da hat wohl noch was gefehlt?

[amada]

up

[fixbutte]

Monty Python Sings


Penis Song (The Not Noel Coward Song)

GOOD EVENING, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, HERE`S A LITTLE NUMBER I TOSSED OFF
RECENTLY IN THE CARIBBEAN.

Isn`t it awfully nice to have a penis ,
Isn`t it frightfully good to have a dong .
It`s swell to have a stiffy ,
It`s divine to own a dick .
From the tiniest little tadger ,
To the world`s biggest prick .

So three cheers for your willy or John Thomas .
Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake .
Your piece of pork ,
Your wife`s best friend ,
Your Percy or your cock .

You can wrap it up in ribbons,
You can slip it in your sock.
But don`t take it out in public
Or they will stick you in the dock,
And you won`t come back.

[fixbutte]

Momus -
"The Penis Song"

[ from the album "Folktronic" (2001) ]

Lyrics

Buckminster Fuller, inventor of the geodesic dome
Once gave a lecture he entitled `Everything I know`
Taking the title literally, he spoke four years or so
And I intend to do the same, so make yourself at home
(Pull up a chair, smoke a cigar or something)
Cynthia Plaster Caster once took my cast and showed me
In a penis exhibition in a gallery on Broadway
So many people saw my penis in its glass case
They recognise my penis now before my face

Subject for today: does knowledge elevate or demean us?
Everything you didn`t want to know about my penis

A baker has a penis thing for flattening the dough
But stick it in the oven and it rises up, like so
The man who chops the melons up with a long and pointed knife
Has a penis with a mottled skin, I know, I asked his wife
(Very curious)
A priest beneath his cassock has a penis just the same
Some call the hypothalamus the penis of the brain
One man`s sport is fly fishing, the other`s pocket billiards
Congratulations, Watson, on your almost-Freudian brilliance

The comedian from hell always thinks he can entertain us
With everything we didn`t want to know about his penis

Like the heather of the Highlands, mine is tipped with flecks of purple
With a head as wise as Solomon, although shaped like a turtle
It wears a flesh-tone roll-neck and the neck goes up and down
It comes out in the evenings and on Friday paints the town
Obsessively, compulsively, it only wants one thing
To fill your chosen orifice with ropes of pearly string
Delivering its message to your womb or to your tongue
And then going slack and flaccid when its pressing work is done

In witty conversation, by drip or intravenus
I drop everything you didn`t want to know about my penis
(Some sort of Tourette Syndrome)

It`s a very fine philosopher, debating right and wrong
Shows promise as a songwriter (it writes most of my songs)
Don`t bury it in boxer shorts but wear it like a tie
Or avant garde jewellery hanging from your fly
(Very chic!)
Jean Luc Godard once declared, to gales of mystified laughter
That some men wash their hands before they touch it, others after
And if you slot it carefully where the sun will never shine
You`ll feel what`s mine becoming yours, what`s yours becoming mine

Ladies and hermaphrodites, my tender-hearted readers
Everything you didn`t want to know about my penis

There was a bohemian monk
Who went to bed in a bunk
He dreamt that Venus
Was stroking his penis
And woke up all covered in .....

Thought for the day: does abstinence dirty us or clean us?
Everything you didn`t want to know about my penis

It`s a tribute to the power of something otherwise mundane
That waving it under a stranger`s nose is said to scar his brain
I`m doing my bit to see the power of taboo remains intact:
I keep a penis on my head but never lift my hat
(I keep a penis on my head but never lift my hat)

And if I`ve bored you stiff with this riff about my penis
I wouldn`t let a little thing like that come between us

And if you can think of another song even more atrocious
Well supercalifragilisiticexpifuckingdocious

[fixbutte]

Super Süß und Super Sexy Der Penis Song im Original



Your penis is so hard, your penis is just so large, my body is a movie and your penis is the star!

You’re too big to fit in here,too big to fit in here, too big to fit in here

You’re too big to fit in here, too big to fit in here, too big to fit in here

What a lovely ride, your penis is a thrill, your penis is a Cadillac, a giant park DA Ville

Your penis packs a wallet, your penis brings a load, and when it makes deliveries, it needs it’s own zip code

9-00’penis

You’re too big to fit in here, too big to fit in here, too big to fit in here

Your penis is so strong, your penis is so smooth

Your penis got a rhythm, your penis makes me groove

Your penis is a dream, the biggest one I’ve seen

It’s oozy and it’s green, Ewwww, Sorry

You’re too big to fit in here, too big to fit in here, too big to fit in here

You’re too big to fit in here, too big to fit in here, too big to fit in here

Your penis is so big, your penis is so thick, your penis is so pretty

Oh you’ve gotta have some lick

My body is a movie, your penis a star, starring your penis

You’re too big to fit in here, too big to fit in here, too big to fit in here

You’re too big to fit in here, too big to fit in here, too big to fit in here.

[fixbutte]

The Vandals - Christmas Time For My Penis
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


I see you`ve been feeling down
When I needed you, you`ve been around
So this year I`ve a Christmas surprise
that will make your spirits rise...

I think back on the times, when you`ve always been there for me
And when things seemed unclear- you did the thinking for me.

I owe you so much that its hard,
to repay you for all the good times
and I won`t forget you this year..
It`s Christmas time for my penis.

I know I have let you down when you just needed a hand
When I was uncertain, you showed me that I am a man

I owe you so much that its hard,
to repay you for all the good times
And I`m going to give you the joy
that you`ve earned this year pal...
It`s Christmas time for my penis.

I owe you so much that its hard,
to repay you for all the good times
It`s Christmas time for my penis.

I know you`ve been feeling down,
all pent up its so hard to breathe
Don`t fret this Christmas-
you`ll get the attention you need

I love you so much that it`s hard,
to repay you for all the good times
we`ll get whores and pornography-
your special holiday, pal...
It`s Christmas time for my penis.

[fhr]

pfui deibel ihr ferkel - euch sollte man alle spermen äh ich wollte sagen sperren -

[SleepingBeauty]

Mit ein wenig Übung kann man auch ganz gut ohne pinkeln.

[fixbutte]

hier noch eine andere Version von #1
http://www.starterupsteve.com/swf/penissong.html

[fixbutte]

Sleeping Beauty #15

Du meinst sicher dieses Teil hier

The Vagina Song
by Tom Green

Some of them are hairy
Some of them are bald
Some are kinda scary
and this is what they`re called...

(chorus)
Vagina...
Vagina....
They call that thing vagina....

Some belong to virgins
They`re really tight and strong
But big or small, I love `em all
That`s why I sing my song

(chorus)

Vagina!!!!!

Some of them are smelly
Like clams and fish and such
Some smell like a summer`s eve
Cuz they`ve been douched too much!!!!

(chorus)
(chorus)

Nothing could be finer
than to be in a vagina
in the morning...